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VERY
INTERESTING STUFF


In the
1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed
To beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence we have 'the rule
Of thumb'


Many years ago in
Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen
Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus, the word GOLF entered
Into the English language.
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The first couple to
Be shown in bed together on prime time TV was Fred and Wilma
Flintstone
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Men can read smaller
Print than women can; women can hear better.

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Coca-Cola was
Originally green.
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It is impossible to lick
Your elbow.
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The State with the
Highest percentage of people who walk to work:
Alaska

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The percentage of
Africa that is wilderness: 28%
(now get This...)
The percentage of
North America that is wilderness: 38
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The cost of raising
A medium-size dog to the age of eleven
$ 16,400
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The average number
Of people airborne over the U.S. In any given
Hour:
61,000Â​

(this is significantly less since Covid-19)

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Intelligent people
Have more zinc and copper in their hair..

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The first novel ever
Written on a typewriter, Tom Sawyer.
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--------- -
The San Francisco
Cable cars are the only mobile National
Monuments.
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Each king in a deck
Of playing cards represents a great king from history:

Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander,The Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x
111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987, 654,321

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If a statue in the
Park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air,
The person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in
The air, the person died because of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died
Of natural causes

(If the statue is on the ground it is because of political reasons!)


-
 
Only two people
Signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4, John Hancock
And Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but
The last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

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Q. Half of all
Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
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Q. Most boat owners
Name their boats. What is the most popular boat name
Requested?

A.
Obsession

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Q.. If you were to
Spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you
Would find the letter 'A'?

A. One
Thousand

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------

Q. What do
Bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser
Printers have in common?


A. All were invented
By women.

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Q. What is the only
Food that doesn't spoil?

A.
Honey
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In Shakespeare's
time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened,
making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the
phrase...'Goodnight , sleep tight'

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It was the accepted
practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the
wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with
all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because
their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the
honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

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In English pubs, ale
is ordered by pints and quarts.. So in old England , when
customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them 'Mind
your pints and quarts, and settle down.'

It's where we get
the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's'

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Many years ago in
England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or
handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill ,
they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle'
is the phrase inspired by this practice.

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At least 75% of
people who read this will try to lick their
elbow!

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Don't delete this paragraph below
just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read
it.

I cdnuolt blveiee
taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the
ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the
first and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae The rset can be a
taotl mses and you can still raed it wouthit a porbelm. This
is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

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YOU
KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2021 when..

1. You accidentally
enter your PIN on the microwave.
...
 
Hmmm, I get this:

The word 'golf' is not an acronym for anything. Rather, it derives linguistically from the Dutch word 'kolf' or 'kolve,' meaning quite simply 'club. ' In the Scottish dialect of the late 14th or early 15th century, the Dutch term became 'goff' or 'gouff,' and only later in the 16th century 'golf.
 
+1 on golf, but many of the others I believe are true.
 
...
 

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[FONT=&quot]My goal for 2021 was to lose 10 Kilos.Only have 14 to go.[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â Â [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons and tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce, and cheese. FINE, it was a pizza....OK, I ate a pizza!  [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]ARE YOU HAPPY NOW[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
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[FONT=&quot]Senility has been a smooth transition for me.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
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[FONT=&quot]I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented. I forgot where I was going with this.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I love approaching 80, I learn something new every day and forget 5 other things.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money so I got up and searched with him.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
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[FONT=&quot]It's weird being the same age as old people.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
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[FONT=&quot]When I was a kid I wanted to be older...this is not what I expected.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
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[FONT=&quot]Chocolate is God's way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]It's probably my age that tricks people into thinking I'm an adult.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Marriage Counselor: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Him: To be honest, I never knew she sold flowers.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]Never sing in the shower! Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So remember..Don't sing![/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I see people about my age mountain climbing; I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
 Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]If you can't think of a word, say "I forgot the English word for it."Â That way people will think you're bilingual instead of an idiot.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]I'm at a place in my life where errands are starting to count as going out.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Coronacoaster: noun; the ups and downs of a pandemic. One day you're loving your bubble, doing workouts, baking chocolate cake and going for long walks and the next you're crying, drinking gin for breakfast and missing people you don't even like.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]I'm at that age where my mind still thinks I'm 29, my humor suggests I'm 12, while my body mostly keeps asking if I'm sure I'm not dead yet.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]I don't always go the extra mile, but when I do it's because I missed my exit.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Â [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]You don't realize how old you are until you sit on the floor and then try to get back up.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Â
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[FONT=&quot]We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads.[/FONT]



















[/FONT]
 
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy, 'Son, how old are you?'
'Eight', the boy replied.
The man continued, 'Do you know what these are used for?'
The boy replied, 'Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four."
"Oh, really?" the pharmacist replied with a grin.
"Yes." the boy said. "We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do none of those." ??
 
Not sure I get this but someone will:
image6(29).jpg
 
Mid 1960s this musta been. Montreal's Mirabel Airport had just been completed, and Air Newfoundland had applied for landing rights and been granted them. “AirNewf” had made enuff money doing bush flying with things like Noorduyn Norsemans and surplus PBYs left over from Hitler's war to lease a Boeing 707 and inaugurate service from St.John'sMontreal.

On the inaugural flight co-pilot is at the controls. He's getting uneasy. The cloud cover is sorta 9/10 and he is desperately scanning for a hole in the clouds so he can do a VFR approach. And THERE! - just there - is a tiny hole with Mirabel clearly visible through it.

“ROIT”, sez the captain, “Oi 'ave 'er!”. He cranks the aircraft into a tight descending turn, slips through the hole and gets himself lined up for the landing. With the consummate skill of a bushpilot he sets the undercarriage down just where grass becomes tarmac, throws on full reverse thrust, and stands on the brakes with all his might. And, begorrah, his nosewheel stops just where tarmac becomes grass!

Still shaking, the Captain leans back, wipes the sweat from his brow and sez: "Jaisus, Mary'n'Josef! That's the shartest ronway Oi've EVER seen!

Co-pilot looks out his side window and sez: “Oh-ahr — bot look 'ow WIDE it is!”
 
FF`s story above reminds me of an aborted landing flying into (?) the country town Deniliquin in NSW one foggy morning on a Fokker 27. The landing approach seemed normal, until I looked out the window and saw, parallel to the aircraft, a fence, with the runway,also parallel, beyond the fence. At that point, the Fokker began clawing it`s way skywards and a pilot, also Irish sounding, announced "we had failed to make contact with the ground" and would make another attempt. For some reason, the experience remains in memory.
 
"Failed to make contact with the ground." Lol.

On my several trips up and down western Canada to Alaska, I was forced to land almost perpendicular to the runway twice due to strong crosswinds. Once in Lethbridge with 30-40 knot winds blowing across the plains during an otherwise beautiful evening, when they had one of two runways closed for some reason - touched down in the grass, rolled across the runway and came to a stop in the grass. It was late and there was no one there to notice. Once at Fort Nelson which has a verrry wide runway as a former RCAF base. I remember the tower operator saying something smart alec on the radio which was unusual for NavCanada folks ;)
 
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Urine Test

Tree trunk involved.
 

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Co-pilot looks out his side window and sez: “Oh-ahr — bot look 'ow WIDE it is!”

Fred, we had an old Navy cartoon with that same theme:D
 

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A friend was travelling in sheep farming country by coach. He was sat next to a man who would delight in counting and pronouncing the precise number of sheep in each mob of sheep in the paddocks as the coach passed by at highway speed. Amazed by this feat he asked the man how he did it. "Easy" he replied, "I count the legs and divide by four".
 
Just reading the posts about measuring air draft. Quite the topic, 18 posts and counting. Anyway it reminded me of a story about a physics test question which asked how the student would calculate the height if a skyscraper given a barometer. The conventional correct answer involves the density of air, difference in top to bottom atmospheric pressure and an equation to solve.

One student, there always an unconventional one, provided several answers:

> Measure the length of the barometer and use it as a ruler, marking off the length on the side of the building until reaching the top.

> Tie a string to the barometer, lower it over the building side until it was at the bottom and measure the length of string.

> Drop the barometer over the side and measure time to crash. Use Newton’s laws to calculate distance travelled.

> But the best answer was to go into the basement, find the building superintendent and tell him that he can have this shiny new barometer if he’ll tell the height of the building.

A+
 
Mid 1960s this musta been. Montreal's Mirabel Airport had just been completed, and Air Newfoundland had applied for landing rights and been granted them. “AirNewf” had made enuff money doing bush flying with things like Noorduyn Norsemans and surplus PBYs left over from Hitler's war to lease a Boeing 707 and inaugurate service from St.John'sMontreal.

On the inaugural flight co-pilot is at the controls. He's getting uneasy. The cloud cover is sorta 9/10 and he is desperately scanning for a hole in the clouds so he can do a VFR approach. And THERE! - just there - is a tiny hole with Mirabel clearly visible through it.

“ROIT”, sez the captain, “Oi 'ave 'er!”. He cranks the aircraft into a tight descending turn, slips through the hole and gets himself lined up for the landing. With the consummate skill of a bushpilot he sets the undercarriage down just where grass becomes tarmac, throws on full reverse thrust, and stands on the brakes with all his might. And, begorrah, his nosewheel stops just where tarmac becomes grass!

Still shaking, the Captain leans back, wipes the sweat from his brow and sez: "Jaisus, Mary'n'Josef! That's the shartest ronway Oi've EVER seen!

Co-pilot looks out his side window and sez: “Oh-ahr — bot look 'ow WIDE it is!”

Ah yes the Newf bashing will continue.

But I have a REAL Newf story. Said person was standing in his back yard and observed and object falling from the sky. Called the authorities and it was determined that the only thing overhead at that time was the morning New York to London flight, two hours underway, operated by my employer. After some discussion with maintenance and dispatch it was determined that the most conservative course of action was to have the aircraft return to New York for inspections. Nothing was found missing, nor was anything found on the ground.

The rest of the story was that I was on call that day and was summoned to the airport asap to take the airplane to London as the crew was no longer legal for the 7+ hour flight. So we got those poor people there, albeit 10 hours late.....
 
Try this to start your day

You're at your marina and you see someone sitting all by themselves on a bench overlooking the docks. Stroll over, quietly sit next to them and wait for a few seconds, then slowly turn and say in a low voice......
DID YOU BRING THE MONEY?:socool:
 
You're at your marina and you see someone sitting all by themselves on a bench overlooking the docks. Stroll over, quietly sit next to them and wait for a few seconds, then slowly turn and say in a low voice......
DID YOU BRING THE MONEY?:socool:

Yes...

Did you bring the boat?
 
Yes...

Did you bring the boat?

Dear Mods...

For days [basically since I posted this quote] I've not be receiving any email updates from TF. TF is not at all in my junk or trash.

Please rectify if possible.

Thanks! :thumb:

Art :speed boat: :D
 
Dear Mods...

For days [basically since I posted this quote] I've not be receiving any email updates from TF. TF is not at all in my junk or trash.

Please rectify if possible.

Thanks! :thumb:

Art :speed boat: :D

Art I noticed you were not getting any replies either since post 2334
 
Art I noticed you were not getting any replies either since post 2334

Soo - TY for mentioning that.

Interesting... the only way I can converse [post] on TF is to look up a thread. In that, recent rest of posts on this and other threads were/are not reaching my email inbox. To locate your post above... I had to search and link in.

Have no idea why??? Hope the Mods can rectify. Seems a similar item happened to me a year or so ago. As I recall a Mod fixed it.

Being a pleasure boat addict from childhood... TF threads give me considerable mental relaxation from a full array of business thinking/doing and family thangs.

:dance:
 
Hard to fool

Farmers would use a small county road to access their fields and thus, would drive their tractors and other farm vehicles up and down the road without incidents. One afternoon a farmer was using the country road when a young state trooper stopped him and was about to write the farmer a citation.
"Sir, you have an unregister vehicle on this country road, and that's illegal."
The trooper said.
"Officer, we use this county road all the time and have been for years."
Said the farmer.
As the farmer was trying to explain himself, the young trooper kept on waving his hand back and forth, across himself, swatting away flies.
"Ahhhh.. trooper, those flies are harmless. They usually fly around the backend of the horses in the barn."
Said the farmer.
"Are you calling me a horse's ass?" Yelled the young trooper.
The farmer looked at the trooper and said, " No sir..... but those flies are hard to fool.":lol:
 

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