Originally Posted by aevdg
I chose our new-to-us boat - its a Kadey Krogen 42. I LOVE it. He gets to have the engine room, pilot house and foredeck all his way - and I get the rest. I think that the most important thing to understand is to clearly delineate who is in charge of what. He docks the boat and I handle the lines. It is my job to have the lines all organized for docking while he concentrates on getting the boat up to the dock so I can step off with the spring line in my hand. When we are docking, I am the one checking to see how far we are away from the dock, is his approach angle correct. We don't question each other - I am in charge of my stuff and he is in charge of his. He cannot see exactly where the boat is in relation to the dock - and with the KK it is going to be even harder - he needs me to be his eyes. Talk out with her on who is going to do what. Abort it - if it isn't going. She needs to trust you - but you also need to trust her. Let her practice. Talk out the process and what to do when and if.
The above sounds pretty much how my partner " The Admiral " handles her part of the boat.. We never talk about docking except if it is port or stbd side tie. We have been boating for 35 years together and the only words spoken on docking is " spring on" or stern on depending on how she ties the boat to the dock. There may be the occasional nod but that is about it... unless she has concerns way before getting close to the dock.
I never worry about fenders, lines as there always in place before we get close to the dock.
As I have mentioned before she wears the title of Admiral with pride.. and knows it is has never been spoken with anything but admiration on my part. We are equal partners on the boat and the decisions as to go/no go are made by both of us.
I know I am totally lucky to have a wife that is into boats and I feel a little less at ease when I do a voyage solo.. even with a experienced crew aboard.