View Single Post
Old 02-13-2017, 06:49 PM   #42
BandB
Guru
 
BandB's Avatar
 
City: Fort Lauderdale. Florida, USA
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 21,449
Quote:
Originally Posted by gilbertpark View Post
I have a wonderful Admiral. I even bought her a brass name plate the "Admiral" and it is on one of the doors (her sewing room) in the house. I will even show her this post.

We have an agreement I am the Captain and my job is to get her from the berth/anchorage to another berth/anchorage of her choice for dinner that evening in a restaurant, with little or no waves or high winds. She does the strategic stuff (which restaurant - {must buy her the new Michelin Guide}, which Roman amphitheatre to see etc) and I do the Executive stuff (weather forecast, route planning etc). If I can't meet the requirements of an easy passage then I tell her and we agree a new plan.

Mooring up we have agreed that fenders and ropes are her prerogative (including the colours). So as not to shout at each other we have walkie talkies with ear pieces and VOX. If it doesn't work we scratch the boat - so what, its easily repaired and happiness is worth more than the odd ding. At sea she takes her turn on watch during long crossings, while I have a nap.

We chose the boat together, although we did see a lot of boats on the way to this one. Since then we have thought of getting a new one but can't find one as good as our Trawler sabre line 36, like us its getting on a bit and needs a lot of TLC. If she needs a few days somewhere for repair then we've agreed thats what we'll do.

For us Admiral is not a derogatory term, nor is Captain, its a recognition of each others role when we go boating. And before you ask we go away for two to three months at a time. Last year Sardinia and Corsica this year the Balerics. Before that Brittany in a 25 foot Seaward power boat.

We have our ups and downs, just as we do on dry land, but with understanding the downs are transient and the ups are long lasting.

By the way Happy Valentines day tomorrow (she has chosen and booked the restaurant where we will be going and will pay {with my credit card})

I reckon I am a lucky to be commanded by an Admiral and if you can achieve that sort of relationship with the give and take you may find you'll be doing the same.
Wifey B: See, I'm fine with you using those terms since they really do seem to match what you do. Now there's some overlap, but sometimes an Admiral would fill in for a Captain on watch. Where my problem comes in is where it's a title given automatically and sometimes with a derogatory undertone. (yes, I've seen it given like she bosses but won't do anything). However, in my case and in Bruce's wife's case it would not be appropriate. I'm a captain. Same as hubby. Same level of license. Gone through it all together and in our roles, we're completely interchangeable. I'm equally capable. I also personally know three other female captains and one engineer. Then I know three others who've completed a captain's course but don't have the sea time. So, I salute you and the Admiral that boats with you. I just think the term is used too loosely sometimes.
BandB is offline   Reply With Quote