Admiral Happiness

[markpierce]

My Perla doesn't like sailboats because "they are too close to the water." Does fine in my trawler, but then neither of us have a desire to spend long periods aboard.

[hmason]

We had a Cal 33 sailboat and my wife loved day sailing but refused to stay on board overnight. She said she refused to be subterranean. I know, below the waterline is more accurate.

Then we bought a trawler and time aboard increased dramatically. The wife then asked to try 6-months aboard as an experiment. It's now 6-years later and we are still aboard although we did upsize the boat. In March the house goes up for sale and we are totally committed.

[menzies]

Kick her to the curb.

Time to move on.

Your next will be a curvaceous blonde or red head with 48DD bikinis. It doesn't matter what resources she brings with her.

You will be in boaters heaven until you croak from a massive heart attack brought on by multiple orgasms every night.

But you will die very very happy.

Then the bimbo gets half the money that your missus and her kids would have received.

* * * * * *
OK, now we have the dummy set-up, when you are ready to show your wife this post let me know and I will delete this part!

[Peter B]

Originally Posted by RT Firefly

Greetings,
Mr. p. If that is the case, I take it all back (post #2).

Another 'Outlander' tragic, perchance..? I admit to being guilty as charged.

[Mako]

Originally Posted by proudsailor

I can singlehand my sailboats, not so sure of the same for a 40 or 50 foot trawler.

I think you've got that backwards. A power boat is way easier to manage than a sailboat. Sitting in your 'jammies and socks, with the heater going and the wipers wiping, a cup of coffee in your hand, the autopilot ticking, the engine purring....

Twin engines on a 60-70 footer can be managed solo even when docking. A single with a bowthruster, perhaps even easier.

Don't doubt yourself. As an experienced sailor you will have no issues with a 40-50 powerboat although you'll want to gain confidence with some handling lessons at first. Enjoy!

[menzies]

Here, practice your twin engine maneuvering!

Play Atari Battlezone - IGN

[menzies]

Originally Posted by markpierce

My Perla doesn't like sailboats because "they are too close to the water." Does fine in my trawler, but then neither of us have a desire to spend long periods aboard.

What is the significance of the dinosaurs?

[Bacchus]

Proudsailor...

Welcome to the dark side!

My $0.02 is similar but slightly astray from the TF crowd that already responded.

I agree - chartering will help you both decide a lot - however - extrapolating a one week experience to FULL TIME and selling the home base is IMHO a bigger leap than from sail to power.

For background - that comes from a couple that easily travels in motorhome & trawler for 1-3 mos but would not consider it w/o a home base to come back to. We've often said that might be a condo near / on the water if we found the right location / opportunity.
My brother's a blow-boater and she's learned that a sailboat is not for her - if I were to go that route I'd be in your current situation.

I would suggest - find a boat that you both can experience the trawler lifestyle that could provide comfort for extended cruising (mos). but you might want to start w/ short - medium cruises to "test the waters" - extend the time if all goes well - then decide whether full time and selling home base could really work.

I understand that approach might mean a different boat in the future and I understand the risk of $ to sell & upgrade. You have to balance that risk against the $ if you go "all-in" to start and it doesn't work?

And the lesson I learned from the last boat purchase was - make the process fun and enjoyable for both. When I first broached the subject of bigger boat w/ more amenities / comfort my admiral thought I was smoking or drinking something I shouldn't. However - after a few boat shows and exploring some potential candidates w/ brokers we found one we both liked and it spoke to us - condition & price were both issues and the admiral agreed - find one of these in good condition at a reasonable price and let's go for it. The above excursions were leisurely and w/o pressure - B&B's, dinner out to talk +/- of what we saw during the day. I also had a written list of musts & wants that included our collective inputs - so the admiral had equal inputs to the wish list

Bottom line - Only you & the admiral can decide if you are the adventurous type and making a commitment to sell the home as an "experiment" is for you or you'd be better off "testing the waters" before jumping in, better suits your temperament.

Enjoy the search and decision process however it turns out.
and BTW - my admiral enjoys the title - recognizes it gives her the status she desires...more so than first mate!!!

[johnrupp]

Originally Posted by Bacchus

Proudsailor...



Welcome to the dark side!



My $0.02 is similar but slightly astray from the TF crowd that already responded.



I agree - chartering will help you both decide a lot - however - extrapolating a one week experience to FULL TIME and selling the home base is IMHO a bigger leap than from sail to power.



For background - that comes from a couple that easily travels in motorhome & trawler for 1-3 mos but would not consider it w/o a home base to come back to. We've often said that might be a condo near / on the water if we found the right location / opportunity.

My brother's a blow-boater and she's learned that a sailboat is not for her - if I were to go that route I'd be in your current situation.



I would suggest - find a boat that you both can experience the trawler lifestyle that could provide comfort for extended cruising (mos). but you might want to start w/ short - medium cruises to "test the waters" - extend the time if all goes well - then decide whether full time and selling home base could really work.



I understand that approach might mean a different boat in the future and I understand the risk of $ to sell & upgrade. You have to balance that risk against the $ if you go "all-in" to start and it doesn't work?



And the lesson I learned from the last boat purchase was - make the process fun and enjoyable for both. When I first broached the subject of bigger boat w/ more amenities / comfort my admiral thought I was smoking or drinking something I shouldn't. However - after a few boat shows and exploring some potential candidates w/ brokers we found one we both liked and it spoke to us - condition & price were both issues and the admiral agreed - find one of these in good condition at a reasonable price and let's go for it. The above excursions were leisurely and w/o pressure - B&B's, dinner out to talk +/- of what we saw during the day. I also had a written list of musts & wants that included our collective inputs - so the admiral had equal inputs to the wish list



Bottom line - Only you & the admiral can decide if you are the adventurous type and making a commitment to sell the home as an "experiment" is for you or you'd be better off "testing the waters" before jumping in, better suits your temperament.



Enjoy the search and decision process however it turns out.

and BTW - my admiral enjoys the title - recognizes it gives her the status she desires...more so than first mate!!!

Excellent advise, I couldn't have said it better.

[BandB]

Originally Posted by Bacchus

and BTW - my admiral enjoys the title - recognizes it gives her the status she desires...more so than first mate!!!

Wifey B: D, Bruce's wife, and I would definitely not go for first mate. Captain, if you must give us titles, just the same as our spouses.

[ksanders]

My opinion...

Do not even think about moving aboard full time. I'm serious, do not even consider it.

If your wife is considering a trawler, and if a trawler is something you are interested in, then go boat shopping... with her

Start with getting her into the boating lifestyle. To some that means more dock time than anchor'ing out. Figure out what she likes.

If you both ever get to a point where you want to make the jump to full time liveaboard it will be a natural progression.

[Pack Mule]

Originally Posted by BandB

Wifey B: D, Bruce's wife, and I would definitely not go for first mate. Captain, if you must give us titles, just the same as our spouses.

Ain't no Admiral on this rig either .

[bilge53]

This may sound like a silly approach but after an adult beverage or three (loosened up) ask your wife what she likes about the idea and what she perceives today to be on the thumb down side. Start out simple with the expectations. If it is a 30 minute shower and she is reluctant to learn docking, departing and generally helping you there is a problem lurking.

[bayview]

when we graduated from sail and started looking at boats my wife avoided boats she thought were "too sailboaty".. That meant many trawlers, especially europa types.

She really liked the wide interior space of an aft cabin with wide side decks and no stairs. That's what we bought and used together for many years. Have her pick out the charter boat from a fleet with many options.

[markpierce]

Originally Posted by menzies

What is the significance of the dinosaurs?

''

I also don't know the significance of the pirate ship. They weren't part of the commission.

[CWO KPM]

Our house on the dirt is 3BR/2 bath, etc. Miss Micki wants it to be bigger. Hence she only visits the boat.

[gilbertpark]

I have a wonderful Admiral. I even bought her a brass name plate the "Admiral" and it is on one of the doors (her sewing room) in the house. I will even show her this post.

We have an agreement I am the Captain and my job is to get her from the berth/anchorage to another berth/anchorage of her choice for dinner that evening in a restaurant, with little or no waves or high winds. She does the strategic stuff (which restaurant - {must buy her the new Michelin Guide}, which Roman amphitheatre to see etc) and I do the Executive stuff (weather forecast, route planning etc). If I can't meet the requirements of an easy passage then I tell her and we agree a new plan.

Mooring up we have agreed that fenders and ropes are her prerogative (including the colours). So as not to shout at each other we have walkie talkies with ear pieces and VOX. If it doesn't work we scratch the boat - so what, its easily repaired and happiness is worth more than the odd ding. At sea she takes her turn on watch during long crossings, while I have a nap.

We chose the boat together, although we did see a lot of boats on the way to this one. Since then we have thought of getting a new one but can't find one as good as our Trawler sabre line 36, like us its getting on a bit and needs a lot of TLC. If she needs a few days somewhere for repair then we've agreed thats what we'll do.

For us Admiral is not a derogatory term, nor is Captain, its a recognition of each others role when we go boating. And before you ask we go away for two to three months at a time. Last year Sardinia and Corsica this year the Balerics. Before that Brittany in a 25 foot Seaward power boat.

We have our ups and downs, just as we do on dry land, but with understanding the downs are transient and the ups are long lasting.

By the way Happy Valentines day tomorrow (she has chosen and booked the restaurant where we will be going and will pay {with my credit card})

I reckon I am a lucky to be commanded by an Admiral and if you can achieve that sort of relationship with the give and take you may find you'll be doing the same.

[RT Firefly]

Greetings,
Mr. g. You are a smart man!

[Andy G]

Originally Posted by RT Firefly

Greetings,
Mr. g. You are a smart man!

He could do with a shave though

[RT Firefly]

Greetings,
Mr. AG. You sound like MY Admiral. I strongly suspect the gif looks more like me than Mr. g so consider yourself told something that I would NEVER think of telling my Admiral when she suggests a beard trim...