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Police are investing the death of man from unknown causes.

Investigators were told by multiple bar patrons he related how he laughed at his wife for googling how to clean a crime scene when she could hardly keep the house clean.
 
“The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”

– Bill Watterson
 
" If I was married to you I'd poison your drink" - Lady sitting next to Winston Churchill at a State Dinner

" Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it"

- Winston Churchill
 
Brooksie said:
" If I was married to you I'd poison your drink" - Lady sitting next to Winston Churchill at a State Dinner

" Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it"

- Winston Churchill
Click to expand...


Attributed to Viscountess Astor, probably apocryphal, but a good story anyway.
 
….
 

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Brooksie said:
" If I was married to you I'd poison your drink" - Lady sitting next to Winston Churchill at a State Dinner

" Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it"

- Winston Churchill
Click to expand...
Exchange at election rally attributed to Sir Robert Menzies, a Prime Minister of Australia:
1. Heckler: "You are a 2 faced liar"
RM: "Clearly you are not 2 faced. If you were, you would not be wearing that one."
 
The meaning of "SOS"








An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with Tempo Mach 2 appears.
The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies alongside the Airbus and greets the pilot of the passenger plane by radio: "Airbus, boring flight isn’t it?
Now have a look here. He rolls his jet on its back, accelerates, breaks through the sound barrier, rises rapidly to a dizzying height, and then swoops down almost to sea level in a breathtaking dive. He loops back next to the Airbus and asks, "Well, how was that?"
The Airbus pilot answers: "Very impressive, but now you look!" The jet pilot watches the Airbus, but nothing happens. It continues to fly stubbornly straight, with the same speed. After 15 minutes, the Airbus pilot radios, "Well, how was that?
Confused, the jet pilot asks, "What did you do?" Airbus pilot laughs and says, "I got up, stretched my legs, walked to the back of the aircraft to use the washroom, then got a cup of coffee and a chocolate fudge pastry.
The moral of the story is: when you are young, speed and adrenaline seems to be great. But as you get older and wiser, you learn that comfort and peace are more important.
This is called S.O.S.: Slower, Older, Smarter.



​

​



​
 
Brooksie said:
" If I was married to you I'd poison your drink" - Lady sitting next to Winston Churchill at a State Dinner

" Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it"

- Winston Churchill
Click to expand...
Not sure it was Churchill, but similar story:

"Sir, if I saw that belly on a woman, I'd say she was pregnant!"

"Madam, it was.....and she is!!!"
 
Al said:
The meaning of "SOS"








An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with Tempo Mach 2 appears.
The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies alongside the Airbus and greets the pilot of the passenger plane by radio: "Airbus, boring flight isn’t it?
Now have a look here. He rolls his jet on its back, accelerates, breaks through the sound barrier, rises rapidly to a dizzying height, and then swoops down almost to sea level in a breathtaking dive. He loops back next to the Airbus and asks, "Well, how was that?"
The Airbus pilot answers: "Very impressive, but now you look!" The jet pilot watches the Airbus, but nothing happens. It continues to fly stubbornly straight, with the same speed. After 15 minutes, the Airbus pilot radios, "Well, how was that?
Confused, the jet pilot asks, "What did you do?" Airbus pilot laughs and says, "I got up, stretched my legs, walked to the back of the aircraft to use the washroom, then got a cup of coffee and a chocolate fudge pastry.
The moral of the story is: when you are young, speed and adrenaline seems to be great. But as you get older and wiser, you learn that comfort and peace are more important.
This is called S.O.S.: Slower, Older, Smarter.



​

​



​
Click to expand...



That’s a trawler vs a sail boat.
 
Road Safety in rural Australia

image-20221021135639-6.png
 
BruceK said:
image-20221021135639-6.png
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In NZ's North Island not far from Wellington is a fabulous sign hanging outside a bookbinders house on a narrow, dangerous bendy road much used by the local petrol heads.


It says " Arnold Higgins, Antique Bookbinder and Restorer. Slow down Ya Bastards!!!"


Made me chuckle......................
 
15,500 brick patio with:

17' long - hand carved in 2" thick slate - "Masonry" Shark Inlay - I recently designed and built overlooking SF Bay ... Now - That's No Joke, RT! LOL
 

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To all of you in our neighborhood.
I don’t mean to be a Grinch, however, to those of you who are placing Christmas lights and decorations in your yards, would you please avoid anything that has Red or Blue flashing lights together!! Every time I come around the corner, I think it's the police?. I have to brake hard, toss my beer out the window, fasten my seat belt, throw my phone on the floor, turn my radio down, and push the gun under the seat. All the while trying to drive. It's just too much drama, even for Christmas. Thank you for your cooperation and understanding. Have a great Christmas.
 
For the Philosophers

If a man says something while walking in a forest, and a woman/his wife is not there to hear it, is he still wrong?
Discuss.
 
BruceK said:
If a man says something while walking in a forest, and a woman/his wife is not there to hear it, is he still wrong?
Discuss.
Click to expand...

Man can only be deemed wrong by woman/wife - if and when he finishes his thought...

If you want to screw up wife's mind, tell her but 1/2 your thought... then quickly turn and split. Leaves her questioning! She can spend hours going near nuts in her own mind trying to guess what your ending might be, for what you might have actually meant, so she could thereafter maybe proclaim you incorrect!

That works, I know! LOL
 
What happens if these guys go boating?
image-20221216194157-9.png
 
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