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kthoennes said:
.. the 10cc song "I'm Not in Love" that also came out in the 70's. There's a female whisper segment in that song where she apparently says "big boys don't cry" -- but to this day to me it sounds nothing whatsoever like big boys don't cry. To me she says "be quiet, bequest and quiet." Made no logical sense at all but that's what it still sounds like to me, and that's how I'm singing it.

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Thanks for posting the 10cc song, still fresh(?crazy) after all these years(thank you Paul Simon). Odd, I always heard the "big boys don`t cry"line quite clearly.
 
BruceK said:
Thanks for posting the 10cc song, still fresh(?crazy) after all these years(thank you Paul Simon). Odd, I always heard the "big boys don`t cry"line quite clearly.
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It’s “Big toys don’t fly”
 
There's always this song, popular with bank loan officers: "How do I get you a loan?"

 
I wondered for years why there was “no mayonnaise in Ireland”
 
I wondered for years why there was “no mayonnaise in Ireland”

No man is an island
 
image6(24).jpg
 
Subject: CEREMONY

The wedding ceremony came to the point where the minister asked if anyone had anything
to say concerning the union of the bride and groom.

The moment of utter silence was broken when a beautiful young woman carrying a child stood
up. She started walking slowly towards the minister.

The congregation was aghast - you could almost hear a pin drop.

The groom's jaw dropped as he stared in disbelief at the approaching young woman and child.

Chaos ensued.

The bride threw the bouquet into the air and burst out crying.

Then the groom's mother fainted.

The best man and the ushers started giving each other looks and wondering how to save the situation.

The minister asked the woman, "Can you tell us, why you came forward? What do you have to say?"

There was absolute silence in the church.

The woman replied, "We can't hear you in the back."

And that, dear friends, illustrates what happens when people are considered guilty until proven innocent.
 
We don't understand each other... because we don't listen to each other.

We don't listen to each other... because we don't understand each other.

Hopeless... until we all shut up and simply watch each other's good points as well as help each other to create ever more good points.

And, that ain't no joke!
 
Aussie HUMOR IS DIFFERENT



These are classified ads, which were actually placed in Australian Newspapers:

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old,
Hateful little bastard.
Bites!


FREE PUPPIES
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.


FREE PUPPIES.
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.



COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.



JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100.



WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.



****And the WINNER is...****



FOR SALE BY OWNER.
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.




Statement of the Century
Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker--Billy Connolly. "If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"



>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Children Are Quick

____________________________________



TEACHER: Why are you late?

STUDENT: Class started before I got here.

____________________________________

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

________________________________________

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

(I Love this child)

____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

_______________________________________



TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.

Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.....

______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mum is a good cook.

______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's.

Did you copy his?

CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.

(I want to adopt this kid!!!)

___________________________________



TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher.
 
Seeing a bit of humor of the COVID issue:

This happened yesterday and is important information for our age group:


A friend had his 2nd dose of the vaccine at the vaccination center, after which he began to have blurred vision on the way home.


When he got home, he called the vaccination center for advice and to ask if he should go see a doctor or be hospitalized.


He was told NOT to go to a doctor or a hospital, but just to return to the vaccination center immediately and pick up his glasses!!
 
Two guys grow up together, but after college one moves to New York and the other to Washington.

They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf and catch up with each other.

At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf and head for lunch. "Where do you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why Hooters?" "They have those servers with the big boobs, the tight shorts and the gorgeous legs." "You're on."

At age 42, they meet and play golf again "Where you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Again? Why?" "They have cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games." "OK."

At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where do you wanna go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking." "OK."

At age 62 they meet again. After a round of golf, one says, "Where do you wanna go?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy." "Good choice"

At age 72 they meet again. Once again, after a round of golf, one says, "Where shall we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they have senior discounts." "Great choice."

At age 82 they meet and play again. "Where should we go for lunch?" "Hooters." "Why?" "Because we've never been there before." “Okay, let’s give it a try."
 
The following contains indisputable word and math logic. As the entire universe/existence can be displayed/written into words and broken down into math/numerical calculations… This is provable word-to-math existence.

What Makes 100%?

And, specifically… What does it actually mean To Give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about people who say: I am giving more than 100%? We have all been to meetings, or heard on the news, where someone wants you to give over 100% or says they are giving over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

Sooo… What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a sequence of word breakdowns [into math] that provide answers:

WITH:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Represented As
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26


THEN:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

Amazingly… just, look how far Ass Kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 =118%

Words-to-Math Conclusion: While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's Bullshit and Ass Kissing that can put jerks on the top!

Now we know why too many [so called “leaders”] are where they are!

:eek: :nonono:
 
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I've been away too long, is there a new ferry scandal?
 
I think people are still very sore about the Taku, coupled with the current state budget controversy and the usual SouthCentral vs Southeast political dynamic.
 
Alaskaflyer said:
I think people are still very sore about the Taku, coupled with the current state budget controversy and the usual SouthCentral vs Southeast political dynamic.
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Aah.
 

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A man had two of the best tickets for the Masters. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. "No", he says, "the seat is empty.


“This is incredible!" said the man, "who in their right mind would have a seat like this, the biggest golfing event of the whole world, and not use it?”

He says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife always would come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Masters we haven't been to together since we got married



“Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. I guess you couldn't find someone else. A friend or relative or even a neighbor to take the seat?”



The man shakes his head.



“No. They're all at the funeral.”
 
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Englishman, Irishman, Welshman on a beach. Englishman finds a lamp in the same and polishes it. Lord have mercy, out pops a Genie with the "one wish" routine. Irishman says I'd like to be back in Dublin, Guinness in hand and a fair skinned girl on my arm. Poof, gone.
Englishman says I'd like to be at Everton football match, fish and chips in hand watching then destroy Liverpool. Poof gone.
Welshman says, remember that Englishman, Genie says yes I sent him home to England. Welshman says can you build a 200 foot wall around England? Genie says yes and does so. Then the Welshman says "fill it with water I want to go sailing". Poof gone.
Happy Tuesday. Chris
 
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