my rant..why are there no young people.

[eseyoung]

Granted "hands" was used loosely. Maybe I should have said fingers. It finger vs hand, I'd call it a technicality at best. After the incident we choose to leave the club. Not because anyone had broken bones and black eyes. If that were the case obviously it would not have ended as simply as it did.

No one was physically hurt. I was hoping I made that clear.

 

[Billylll]

Granted "hands" was used loosely. Maybe I should have said fingers. It finger vs hand, I'd call it a technicality at best. After the incident we choose to leave the club. Not because anyone had broken bones and black eyes. If that were the case obviously it would not have ended as simply as it did.

No one was physically hurt. I was hoping I made that clear.

You're kidding right? No it was anything but clear.
Bill

 

[eseyoung]

My apologies than. I will be sure to edit my original post.

 

[eseyoung]

It looks like the time to edit has passed. But I wanted to be clear. No one was physically hurt.


My original question. Of consensus about younger families and children has gone awfully off track.

 

[Billylll]

It looks like the time to edit has passed. But I wanted to be clear. No one was physically hurt.


My original question. Of consensus about younger families and children has gone awfully off track.

or threatened? Young children quickly forget if there was no actual violence. It all depends on how you handle your daughter afterwards.
I'm glad we had all boys.
Bill

 

[BandB]

It looks like the time to edit has passed. But I wanted to be clear. No one was physically hurt.


My original question. Of consensus about younger families and children has gone awfully off track.

Wifey B: Terribly off track? You described a situation and now we have no earthly idea what took place that had you so upset and led to your rant about young people not being welcome. You, either intentionally or unintentionally portrayed something far different than reality. Big difference between hands on someone and poking a shoulder with a finger. Big difference between that and things said. Your daughter is asking about the man who pushed your wife? I hope you've explained he didn't push her.

Many here have mentioned young people being desired. Some words said to you by one person set you off to pack up everything and storm away. You reached a conclusion contrary to what many of us have reached.

Now we can only go by what you say. But to me based on what said so far I say much ado about nothing. And frankly might make them less likely to want young people.

You're the one ranting and now we have no idea what about. We don't know what your wife said or what was done to set the old dude off or what he said back. You even imply this led you to sell your boat. Maybe the old dude just didn't like the two of you and it had nothing to do with age.

Well, the old people at our club think I'm funny. And a few of the old dudes tend to watch us play tennis. But they've also said they wished we would come to more activities.

 

[BruceK]

It`s good you brought us back to the issue: resentment by older members of younger members, with kids, in a Club.
I wonder if that was just something the person knew you could not argue back on, being comparatively young with a young child, but in reality just a stick to "beat you with", not the real issue. Arguably the real issue remained the undisclosed overheard conversation taken by the person as applying to him. But, I wasn`t there.
I`m assuming the touching of your wife by this person had incendiary effect ending any chance rational discussion. It sounds a very unpleasant incident. I suspect you are well out of there.
Once a this person could attract majority support, even in cooler days following the incident, to the point you should not remain, your position was lost.
Senior members of a club can feel proprietorial. Support systems of members within a Club can be strong, outweighing the merits of the issue. Life is often not fair. Members of many clubs are older than you. The cost of boat owning, for most a luxury after more essential assets and financial support systems are in place, militates against the number of younger boat owners, but there is no excuse for reverse ageism. I would have expected a club with aging members to value incoming younger members, if not, it is not a good place to be, and you will do well to start again somewhere more hospitable.

 

[psneeld]

Do we even know what WWIII was all about? and why that may push one side or the other to frustration?

 

[MYTraveler]

The hoity toity yacht club just up the road from us has a swimming pool, tennis courts and a thriving junior program. They have a younger membership than our club but the same percentage of slip huggers. This club has an outpost on Catalina Island that is so little used by their members that it might be given back to the Conservancy that runs the island.

If I have correctly guessed the harbor to which you are referring, the hoity toity club did not renew its Catalina Island facilities lease, and its junior program has been eclipsed by that of another club on the other side of the main channel.

 

[Moonstruck]

Well, Eric it seems to have happened again. You asked a question, and described a situation where a YC member jambed his finger touching your wife. You are not the perpetrator here. I think you were totally justified in your actions, if not to be commended for your restraint. You have received a drubbing here that in my opinion was not justified.

It reminds me of Bobby Lee Cook's (the attorney the Matlock series was based on) famous defense of a guilty client. In summation he looked at the jury and said, "he needed killing, and my client was just the man for the job". The jury found his client innocent. Some things are just justifiable.

 

[BandB]

Well, Eric it seems to have happened again. You asked a question, and described a situation where a YC member jambed his finger touching your wife. You are not the perpetrator here. I think you were totally justified in your actions, if not to be commended for your restraint. You have received a drubbing here that in my opinion was not justified.

It reminds me of Bobby Lee Cook's (the attorney the Matlock series was based on) famous defense of a guilty client. In summation he looked at the jury and said, "he needed killing, and my client was just the man for the job". The jury found his client innocent. Some things are just justifiable.

Wifey B: Except Eric said now that the finger (and don't recall jammed being used as the term) was not what upset him. That it was what was said. Also, we don't know that this had anything to do with age and that was his assertion. We might still find the dude guilty but misdemeanor or felony? And guilty of what?

Oh and Matlock was old but he liked young people. How he went from explaining football to enlisting in the army and cleaning toilets to sheriff of Mayberry to a big time lawyer was amazing.....

 

[Moonstruck]

Oh yeah, Bobby Lee Cook drives a Huckins.

 

[Peter B]

It looks like the time to edit has passed. But I wanted to be clear. No one was physically hurt.


My original question. Of consensus about younger families and children has gone awfully off track.

Eseyoung, y'all have been a victim of the endemic virus on the forum called thread drift. Please don't let that put you off. Just hang in here, because the overwhelming message you got was that boating folks in the vast majority just love younger people involved, and love to make them welcome and help them where they can…period…!

 

[Adelaide]

My Wife is 38 and I just turned 40 last week. We own a Trawler after doing the ski boat, Sail Boat, and Bayliner adventures. I have never personally met another trawler owner in our age group, but I look forward to it when we do. Until then, I enjoy boating with the older crowd...... the only downside, everyone goes to bed by 9:00pm. :lol:

Just kidding!

 

[Adelaide]

This isn't the palce to find Solace.

My apologies than. I will be sure to edit my original post.

I did not take your original post the way the other poster did. It was pretty clear what happened. I actually took it as a touch on the shoulder. In no way did I interpret your original comment as anything more. One thing I have found about the internet, it's not a place for you to seek solace. Too many opinions and too many translations of what is written. Good luck to your family and enjoy the water brother!

 

[angus99]

I did not take your original post the way the other poster did. It was pretty clear what happened. I actually took it as a touch on the shoulder. In no way did I interpret your original comment as anything more. One thing I have found about the internet, it's not a place for you to seek solace. Too many opinions and too many translations of what is written. Good luck to your family and enjoy the water brother!

We'll said; I interpreted the situation as you did. Solace, irony and subtle humor are all in short supply in most net groups. TF is still better than most.

 

[Mule]

There have been a lotta I wouldas and you shoulddas here. I was not there, I do not know what I would have done in that situation, however I can say all bets are off once a public ass chewing and touching starts but that is just me. Add in the wife..... Punching her...well.. All I can say, all bets are off..Old? Mentally deranged? Drunk? Alzheimer's? Who really cares...really who cares?
Not my battle but if this guy makes a habit of it somebody is going hurt or kill him. Question is when. I just had a talk the day after with a drunken friend of mine I escorted off my boat about keeping the dragons in the pen. Weekend alcoholic that was out of control. He blacked out, did not remember a thing but still his behavior was so inappropriate had he resisted me he may have drowned when I placed him in the drink...sorry charlie but bad behavior has consequences.
Offended.?? Call the offending person aside and talk about it...not in public..Jump someone verbally in public is risky enough, assault (wife in front of husband?) someone in public during a public ass chewing is one way to meet your maker in this time of conceal and carry. It is best to at least be civil with a measure of common courtesy even if you feel insulted. A lot of lives could have been ruined in an instant because of one dumb a$$.

 

[BandB]

We'll said; I interpreted the situation as you did. Solace, irony and subtle humor are all in short supply in most net groups. TF is still better than most.

Wifey B: Sorry if I misinterpreted but I think one part we all may have and that is that the touch is what drove them away. Now he says it's what was said. Still I don't know if age had anything to do with it. That wasn't clear to me. Maybe that club did dislike young but I just haven't encountered a club that did. Individual members, yeah. There certainly are some people who don't like children being around. Some old bitty's who think we're all after their hubbies if we're polite to them. Some who don't like different kinds of boats. I didn't think it was that the dude slugged her but did interpret more than a touch of a finger on the shoulder and did interpret that as why they left. I obviously was wrong on both accounts.

But any group we join some members won't be thrilled with us. Funniest thing sometimes with the older people, especially the women it seems, is their hearing isn't so great so they talk loud and when they think they're whispering about you, you hear every word.

 

[BandB]

assault (wife in front of husband?) someone in public during a public ass chewing is one way to meet your maker in this time of conceal and carry. It is best to at least be civil with a measure of common courtesy even if you feel insulted. .

Wifey B: Common courtesy always best but I don't really see this as an assault, other than perhaps a verbal one. Hands on is assault. Slugging is. Touching on shoulder I don't think is. But we each interpret things differently and handle them differently. Was there really threat of bodily harm? I don't know. Wasn't there. Just a touch generally isn't. On the other hand, you can feel threatened in some situations without ever being touched.

 

[FlyWright]

I did not take your original post the way the other poster did. It was pretty clear what happened. I actually took it as a touch on the shoulder. In no way did I interpret your original comment as anything more. One thing I have found about the internet, it's not a place for you to seek solace. Too many opinions and too many translations of what is written. Good luck to your family and enjoy the water brother!

+1

Want to be misunderstood? Post something personal and/or poignant for strangers to read on the internet. It's not a place for sympathy or understanding. In those cases I value the opinions of my friends.

 

[Andy G]

Eseyoung, y'all have been a victim of the endemic virus on the forum called thread drift.

With respect Pete, Eseyoung was a victim of some pretty self opinionated pieces of moral judgement masquerading as an opinion.

 

[Peter B]

Eseyoung, y'all have been a victim of the endemic virus on the forum called thread drift.

With respect Pete, Eseyoung was a victim of some pretty self opinionated pieces of moral judgement masquerading as an opinion.

I was trying to be tactful, Andy...

 

[Bay Pelican]

My Wife is 38 and I just turned 40 last week. We own a Trawler after doing the ski boat, Sail Boat, and Bayliner adventures. I have never personally met another trawler owner in our age group, but I look forward to it when we do. Until then, I enjoy boating with the older crowd...... the only downside, everyone goes to bed by 9:00pm. :lol:

Just kidding!

9 pm, absolutely, among our cruising crowd 9 pm is called boaters' midnight.

 

[CPseudonym]

I was trying to be tactful, Andy...

Careful Peter, as that may become contagious.

 

[angus99]

I took "put his hands on" as a euphemism, meaning the guy touched his wife in the heat of an argument.

Merriam Webster: Hands on--relating to, being, or providing direct practical experience in the operation or functioning of something <hands–on training>; also : involving or allowing use of or touching with the hands <a hands–on museum display>

Whether a push, prod or poke of a finger, as many have pointed out, it's grossly inappropriate to touch anybody while you're in a rage. It's interpreted as aggressive behavior and, where I come from, it's crossing a line and would likely be met with aggression . . . and then some . . . by most males and some females.

Pouncing on trivialities . . . as in "what did she do to bring this on" . . . is disrespectful and irrelevant.

If someone on my staff reported an encounter like this and I responded with a "hands-off" attitude like the bridge did, there's a good chance I'd be fired.

 

[janice142]

My Wife is 38 and I just turned 40 last week. We own a Trawler after doing the ski boat, Sail Boat, and Bayliner adventures. I have never personally met another trawler owner in our age group, but I look forward to it when we do. Until then, I enjoy boating with the older crowd...... the only downside, everyone goes to bed by 9:00pm. :lol:

Don't forget the afternoon naps!

You are quite correct though -- when the sun goes down my get up and go heads for the bunk with a book (or my Kindle)

 

[ghost]

I think some of you are fooling yourselves as to trying to freshen up old clubs. It can't be done because the memberships don't really want it. Yes, they all talk about wanting to attract younger members, they are well aware of their own reputations. But its window dressing only. I liken it to car clubs where nobody has built a car in 20 years, they just want the repeat recognition from last year. The yacht club parallel is not that far off.

What they want? They want younger boaters to join, adopt the outdated values of the baby boomers and just play along as never fully accepted junior members. What they don't want is to change themselves to be more attractive to the younger generations. I've seen more than one new member get chased off this way.

It's tough. If I was just starting out boating, I would be severely turned off by just about any/all of the exiting clubs. This is at a time when it is increasingly harder for new boaters to get into the activity. We see fewer families every year. Boats get bigger, but ironically without more people on board. You can only sell so many t-shirts to one slip. We may still have marina's, but with this trend "destinations" will be fewer and far between.

The bigger trend I now see is the exodus of even long time boaters. Without the younger generation to take their place, the math starts to get simple.

 

[Northern Spy]

Welcome ghost.

Agree entirely.

 

[Billylll]

Ghost, welcome are you the same Ghost from BE?
I agree with you as well.
Well stated...
Bill

 

[Lollygag]

We are generally not "joiners". I did join a yacht club once for reciprocal privliges. I used them once in Dana Point and got so much grief from a receptionist I never used them again and quit the club. There are people around that think their view is the only view and their opinion is the only right one. Ignore them if possible and leave, like you did, if you can't ignore them. Most of us started boating around your age and just grew up. Didn't mean for it to happen but there you go. I'd rather buddy boat with you and your family than the old geezer. And I'm 66.