View Single Post
Old 12-15-2010, 11:01 AM   #1
marinetrader
Senior Member
 
marinetrader's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 301
Getting Your Partner to Like Boating

Mary and I repeatedly encounter couples where one is a knowledgeable cruiser and the other is a beginner.** How to balance the scale and get the novice at ease?* Will living and cruising aboard ever work when one of the parties is inexperienced or a tad uncertain how or if to proceed?*

The first step is to introduce boating gradually.* Charter a trawler together so you know whether it is something that might work before you make the plunge and acquire a new or used trawler or motor yacht together.* Go out on weekend cruises with acquaintances who own boats.* Is your mate secure?* The old saying is that you either love it or hate it.

Once you have made the decision to proceed with buying a boat, be sure your partner is involved in the purchase process.** Both of you must like*everything about the motor yacht or trawler you purchase.* Look at boats via the web and compose a catalog of what you like.* Compare notes to make certain you and your mate like the same things fundamentally.* If not, you will be selling it yet again in a few months.* We have experienced this time and again.* The engines and all systems will appeal to the man; the interior layout and design will appeal to the woman.** The man can love the engines and all the expensive electronic gear but if the bath or galley is not just right for the lady, you will not be purchasing that particular trawler.* If mama ain't happy, no one's happy.

Find a yacht broker that will perform as your buyer's broker.* An experienced broker will show you through the buying procedure and assist you in learning about your vessel following the purchase.

At this time you've invested in your dream vessel and have outfitted her with everything you require to cruise full time.** It's time to take her away from the pier.* But before starting the engines, formulate a plan.* Figure how you will move from the wharf and how you will drop the anchor.* How will you return to the dock?* Discuss this strategy with each other so everyone is aware his or her task.* This is where communication plays a crucial role.* Each party must be familiar with their role in this procedure.* Once you get away from the wharf, try* maneuvering in the open water.* Practice is the means to gaining confidencepractice your docking techniques also.* When your inexperienced partner feels self-assured, you've won the game.* After a few maneuvers, review what was done precisely and what needs further practice.* This is the key to having fun.* And don't be scared of making errors.* We have all been there.*

One mistake NOT to make is with regard to communication.* Yelling will get you nowhere.* It will stress your partner to the point where he or she will be prone to make errors or it will make them so annoyed they will throw up their hands and give up.** Yelling can be a sign of your own stress/anxiety which could be interpreted by your partner that you don't have a clue, thus stressing them out.* Try to talk calmly and in a normal tone.* If you do end up yelling at your mate, you'll want to apologize later; otherwise you might be sleeping on the fly bridge that night.

Relentless coaching can lead to problems too.* If you are trying to train your mate how to run the vessel, looking over his/her shoulder and coaching each minute can lead to worry.* The partner will start focusing on your condemnation rather than how they are operating the yacht.** As in all avenues of life, communication is the answer.* Oh, and when your novice mate does something correct, give them an ata-boy; works all the time.

If you are successful in getting your partner to enjoy a pleasurable day on the water, you can expect many new trips trying to duplicate that memory, I guarantee it.
marinetrader is offline   Reply With Quote