Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 05-03-2018, 11:46 AM   #1
Guru
 
cardude01's Avatar
 
City: Victoria TX
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Bijou
Vessel Model: 2008 Island Packet steadysailer
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 4,319
What skill did you pass on to your kids?

My apocalyptic thread about climate change got me thinking about this again. I often think Iíve failed for not yet passing on a ďskillĒ to my kids, but the only skill I really have is finance related, and selling and working on cars. Iíve tried to pass some of the finance skill on but that has not taken, and in their defense Iím a terrible teacher and probably donít really know that much. Iíve passed on a little bit of mechanical skill. Not much. My kids are boys ages 18 and 21. One in college. One leaving for college in September.

One skill I would like to learn and then pass on to them would be cruising (probably sailing) self-sufficiently. This dovetails with my sometime apocalyptic views, and my desire to live the rest of my years cruising to interesting locations. This is kind of a pipe dream right now since my wife is really not on board (yet!) because she doesnít think we could live full time on our smallish boat, and she is not ready to sell the dirt house and leave her community. If I bought a bigger boat (like a decent size sail cat) I would have a better chance, but Iím not ready to do that yet until my wife is ready.

Anyway, what skills were others on the forum able to pass on to their kids?
__________________
Advertisement

cardude01 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 01:09 PM   #2
Guru
 
ancora's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 3,679
My mechanical skills as a millwright. Doing all my own engine work on both gas and diesel engines with my son gave him the incentive to become a chief engineer in the Merchant Marine.
__________________

ancora is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 04:41 PM   #3
Guru
 
dhays's Avatar
 
City: Gig Harbor
Country: United States
Vessel Name: Kinship
Vessel Model: North Pacific 43
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 8,433
I, like cardude, feel Iíve failed when it comes to passing on skills to my kids. Partly because I donít have a lot of skills.

My Dad had all kinds of skills, but it was simply because he wasnít afraid to tackle projects that he didnít have the knowledge and skills for. In the process, he learned. I learned that attitude from my Dad, but my kids didnít. Rather than figure it out, they simply ask me.

My son seems to think that I know the answers to everything, which is ridiculous on its face. If I tell him ďI have no ideaĒ his response is, ďNo really, what do you think.Ē He is a financial analyst for a large corporation. At times he will text or call me with a finance question. I am as ignorant as they come with finance. However, by the time he explains his question to his ignorant father, he usually has come up with a solution. Maybe it is similar to that quote that Peggie uses in her signature, ďif you canít explain it to a 6 year old....Ē. In this case, it an ignorant 60 year old.
__________________
Regards,

Dave
SPOT page
dhays is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 04:53 PM   #4
GFC
Guru
 
GFC's Avatar
 
City: Tri Cities, WA
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Beachcomber
Vessel Model: Sea Ray 550 Sedan Bridge
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3,650
Objective, analytical thought.


I think one of my best attributes/skills is the ability to take a step back from a situation, look at it objectively and make a rational decision.


In other words, I ain't no frickin mecanik so no skills there to pass along.
__________________
Mike and Tina
Beachcomber 1995 Sea Ray 550 Sedan Bridge
GFC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 05:17 PM   #5
Guru
 
LaBomba's Avatar
 
City: Beaverton, Ontario
Country: Canada
Vessel Name: Looking Glass
Vessel Model: Carver 370 Voyager
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,158
Not sure that it is a skill but I always taught my 4 kids that if a person wants a job they can find one. There is no excuse for not being employed. It may not be what they want to do for the rest of their life but when you need to put a roof over the family and keep food on the table, you do what you need to do at the time, then look for something better as time allows. Luckily my kids have all turned out to be hard working adults and I'm proud of them all.
__________________
Allan
LaBomba is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 05:25 PM   #6
Guru
 
dhays's Avatar
 
City: Gig Harbor
Country: United States
Vessel Name: Kinship
Vessel Model: North Pacific 43
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 8,433
Quote:
Originally Posted by LaBomba View Post
Not sure that it is a skill but I always taught my 4 kids that if a person wants a job they can find one. There is no excuse for not being employed.
A good friend of mine in graduate school once told me that he never lacked for a job. When his father was dying of cancer when my friend was about 12-14, his father's dying prayer was that his son never lack for a job. My friend said that even in the worst of economies, he was always able to find work to support himself through college and grad school. While the rest of us were always stressing about that part-time or summer job, he never did and he always had opportunity to work hard and support himself.

So, if you passed that idea on to your kids, that is a legacy to be proud of.
__________________
Regards,

Dave
SPOT page
dhays is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 05:26 PM   #7
Guru
 
MurrayM's Avatar
 
City: Kitimat, North Coast BC
Country: Canada
Vessel Name: Badger
Vessel Model: 30' Sundowner Tug
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 4,817
Not to be a herd follower.

How to "see"
__________________
"The most interesting path between two points is not a straight line" Murray Minchin
MurrayM is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 05:47 PM   #8
Guru
 
FoxtrotCharlie's Avatar
 
City: Mississippi
Country: USA
Vessel Name: ADAGIO
Vessel Model: CHB Present 42 Sundeck
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 582
My 27yr old son picked up my handy man skills and surpassed me long ago. Together we totally rebuilt a mid 50's home he purchased - down to the studs. And fortunately he also picked up my finance/investment skills - he has an accounting degree. My 31 yr old daughter had seen both parents get MBA's and work hard, and she now has a masters degree in Public Policy/ Healthcare from Duke. She is a healthcare policy analyst with MediCare - trying to save it for all of us I think my daughter has more of my sense of adventure, but so proud of both of them.
FoxtrotCharlie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 06:12 PM   #9
Guru
 
jimisbell's Avatar
 
City: Ingleside-On-The-Bay, Texas
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Papillon
Vessel Model: 1978 Mainship 34 Trawler #95
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 612
My father passed it to me and I passed it to my two girls.

Children always whine, "I can't do that" when presented with a difficult task.

My father would respond,

"There is no such word as can't. The word you are searching for is WON'T! You can do anything you want to do if you want to do it bad enough. You can put a quart of piss in a pint jar if you really want to. "

This coming from a man with only a 3rd grade education that advanced himself to "County Civil Engineer" of the largest county in the united states. When they advertised for his replacement after his death the job was stated as requiring a Masters Degree in Civil Engineering. He died a millionaire and 3 of his 5 children also became millionaires. He taught us well.

Self sufficiency is the skill. Learn what you need, don't cry about not being able to succeed. Just do it.
jimisbell is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 06:31 PM   #10
Guru
 
City: Northport
Country: USA
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,425
"Anyway, what skills were others on the forum able to pass on to their kids?"

A few anyway....
- patience
- do your best ignore the rest
- focus and hard work
- boat piloting and docking
- value of money
- money is certainly not everything
smitty477 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 06:36 PM   #11
Guru
 
FoxtrotCharlie's Avatar
 
City: Mississippi
Country: USA
Vessel Name: ADAGIO
Vessel Model: CHB Present 42 Sundeck
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 582
Yep, my Dad grew up poor on a small Mississippi farm - got home from WW2 at age 28, thought that was too old to use GI bill for college. Got a job at a small bank and three yrs later married the boss's daughter. My grandfather (the boss) died in 1958 - my father was running the bank since 1950. He ran the bank (Pres/CEO) til 2006 - 56 yrs! He read everything he could get his hands on - Progressive Farmer, Nat Geo, Scientific American, Wall St Journal, The Economist, Barrons. That's what I grew up reading also. All four of his kids went to college and all have Masters degrees. My brothers are running the bank now and my nephew is next in line - four generations running a family business - rare these days. Oh yeah, I was the black sheep - I was an investment banker.
FoxtrotCharlie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 06:44 PM   #12
Guru
 
jimisbell's Avatar
 
City: Ingleside-On-The-Bay, Texas
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Papillon
Vessel Model: 1978 Mainship 34 Trawler #95
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 612
Quote:
Originally Posted by FoxtrotCharlie View Post
Yep, my Dad grew up poor on a small Mississippi farm -
My father was the son of a share cropper in Oklahoma. Proves you dont need help if you are willing to work.

Oh, I used the GI bill at 33 to earn both my degrees. Its never too late.
jimisbell is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 07:47 PM   #13
Guru
 
Old deckhand's Avatar
 
City: Sitka
Country: Same
Vessel Model: Transpacific Marine Eagle 32
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 519
To my sons:
If you buy a sport car made damn sure it is red

When you sits down to play poker, if after five minutes you don't know who the fool is it is time to leave

When it comes to women make damn sure you are thinking with the right head.

The boys are fine
Old deckhand is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 08:45 PM   #14
Guru
 
Dougcole's Avatar
 
City: Carrabelle, FL
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Morgan
Vessel Model: '05 Mainship 40T
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,170
I'm trying to teach my 15 YO son to saltwater fly cast right now.

I was a tarpon on fly guide for about 15 years, and I'm a pretty solid caster even now. Years ago I tried to teach my very intelligent, coordinated, athletic wife to cast. That was a dismal failure.

Hopefully it will go better with my son.
Dougcole is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 08:49 PM   #15
Guru
 
Maerin's Avatar
 
City: East Coast
Country: USA
Vessel Name: M/V Maerin
Vessel Model: Solo 4303
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 825
A whole set of skills. My oldest daughter worked in the plumbing shop after school stocking fittings, repairing tools, pulling materials for jobs and loading out trucks. Went along on service calls. She learned how a service business functions and gained a respect for tradesmen who twist wrenches. Her younger brother did the same, and went on to work full time as an apprentice under me as well as my senior tech. He now works in the trade on the opposite coast and sis lives there, too. Neither really had the desire to take over the business when I quit to cruise full time, they knew the demands; but they both acknowledge the time spent in the family business was invaluable in their subsequent endeavors. Middle daughter-different story.
__________________
Steve Sipe
Selene 4303 Maerin
http://maerin.net
Maerin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2018, 09:01 PM   #16
Guru
 
Benthic2's Avatar
 
City: Boston Area
Country: United States
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 1,484
Hopefully:

To be a little skeptical
To respect women
That effort is more important than outcome
Don't trust anyone that doesn't like dogs
and to listen to the Ocean....it has a lot to say.
Benthic2 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-04-2018, 02:04 PM   #17
Guru
 
jimisbell's Avatar
 
City: Ingleside-On-The-Bay, Texas
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Papillon
Vessel Model: 1978 Mainship 34 Trawler #95
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 612
I received this and it was said that Bill Gates authored it. I am not sure that Bill Gates authored this, BUT it really doesn't matter who authored it. It could have been written by a homeless beggar.

In any case, It is good advice for young people today.

Rule 1 : Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2 : The world doesn't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity.
Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: They called it opportunity.

Rule 6 : If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault,
so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you
talk about how cool you thought you were:
So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room..

Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer.

*This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters.
You don't get summers off and very few employers
are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.
*Do that on your own time.

Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life.
In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds.
Chances are you'll end up working for one..
jimisbell is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2018, 06:42 AM   #18
Senior Member
 
City: Florida
Country: United States
Vessel Model: 420AC Sea Ray
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 349
Click image for larger version

Name:	IMG_0780.jpg
Views:	49
Size:	145.6 KB
ID:	75973

My 13 year old can run a boat better than most adults.

When he was 6 I showed him how to follow a compass and he crossed us to the Bahamas in a 23í boat. Heís now moved on to bigger boats.

My 11 year old is in a similar situation but doesnít care too much about the boats. He can run a small boat with ease though. Click image for larger version

Name:	IMG_0871.jpg
Views:	48
Size:	111.7 KB
ID:	75974
k9medic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2018, 10:23 AM   #19
Senior Member
 
JustBob's Avatar
 
City: Bainbridge Island
Country: USA
Vessel Name: Mahalo
Vessel Model: 2018 Hampton Endurance 658
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 465
Achievement.
Being good to others.
Cooking.
__________________
JustBob
www.mvmahalo.com
JustBob is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2018, 10:40 AM   #20
FOG
Guru
 
FOG's Avatar
 
City: Wilmington, NC
Country: USA
Vessel Name: DreamQuest
Vessel Model: Prairie 36
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 549
I called skills, tools when teaching my 3 sons and daughter. I believe I gave each one the same tool box with the same set of instructions as they were growing up.

With my youngest now 40, I have observed that they all use their tool boxes. They have become very efficient with the tools they prefer to use and less efficient with the ones they dislike. I guess they are developing their own tool boxes to pass on to their kids.

However, one son prefers to use his hammer to cut wood instead of his saw. He eventually gets the job done, but .... He has decided not to have children.
__________________

FOG is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off





All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:22 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0
Copyright 2006 - 2012
×