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Old 05-05-2018, 09:49 AM   #21
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Didn’t do kids but if I had I’d want to pass on the ability to have an intelligent conversation. That includes a large and broad range of knowledge and the art of delivering it to smart people that will have very meaningful things to return in the conversation.
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Old 05-05-2018, 09:55 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nomad Willy View Post
Didn’t do kids but if I had I’d want to pass on the ability to have an intelligent conversation. That includes a large and broad range of knowledge and the art of delivering it to smart people that will have very meaningful things to return in the conversation.

That is an excellent point. My sister and I were given the privilege and expectation to participate in discussions with the family. My mom was a teacher by profession and my dad was a teacher by inclination. They rejected the old notion that children should be seen and not heard. My wife and I showed the same respect to our kids and they can have intelligent conversations with anyone on most any topic.
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Old 05-05-2018, 03:40 PM   #23
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No children so below not passed down but rather most significant traits / skills passed down to me.

Both my dad & grandfather were great role models / mentors.

Both were handy - able to do most any job found around the home - carpentry, plumbing, electrical, concrete, roofing etc - granddad built cottages by himself to establish a summer resort.

The most important thing learned was "attitude"
1) Strong work ethic - not afraid to work hard, sweat or get dirty

2) The only thing that is "rocket science" is rocket science - so if you don't know how to do something figure it out - find out how to do it - read (no internet / YouTube back then!) and talk to others that know more than you. Then don't be afraid to give it a try - even if not perfect the first time you know you can do it and likely know how to do it better the second time.

3) Don't be afraid to follow your dreams - Granddad worked for a municipality but he loved hunting & fishing. He bought land in the Mtns of NY - built a resort - became a licensed guide and made a decent living with fishermen, hunters and summer vacationers and the grandkids got to grow up working summers at the resort having fun but more importantly learning the whole time.
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Old 05-05-2018, 04:52 PM   #24
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Thanks Dave,
My mom was a teacher too. Dad was a publisher. My life was filled w smart people. Mom always gave me a long leash or none. Started out in Juneau and mom and I went to Seattle every summer on the steamer. She gave me the run of the ship. Never got into trouble but the other mothers on board were appalled at my mom’s child rearing techniques. Maybe I learned not to fall overboard because of my long leash.
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Old 05-05-2018, 05:07 PM   #25
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There is a lot to that "long leash" I remember at the age of 12 I told my mother I wanted to ride my bicycle, 50 miles, to Mt Palomar where I wanted to "live off the land" for two weeks. She said "OK" and off I went. I returned two weeks later with a broken leg that I didnt know was broken till 50 years later when a doctor asked me when I broke it. I learned a lot on that trip. Then 60 years after the trip I found out that my mother had asked my Scout Master to follow me all the way to Palomar to make sure I was safe. .After two days he came back and told her I was fine. He didnt witness the accident that broke my leg, but I survived it on my own.

My mother believed, as a mother Eagle does, that the young will never fly if they are not kicked out of the nest.
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Old 05-05-2018, 06:52 PM   #26
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Wifey B: Do what is right. Obviously people differ on what they feel is right but you must base it on your own beliefs. If you see someone in need, help. Don't think of this and that and why and why not, just do it. Take a chance if you must. It may even lead sometimes to serious consequences, but you'll always feel good about yourself.
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Old 05-05-2018, 06:57 PM   #27
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Work hard , be happy , love and keep good rum on the shelf .
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Old 05-05-2018, 07:48 PM   #28
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In the end, memories will always be worth more than money or the things money can buy.
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Old 05-05-2018, 07:52 PM   #29
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We can also learn from our children...see signature below for the wise lesson our daughter taught me in her toddler years
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Old 05-05-2018, 08:01 PM   #30
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It has been said that we can inherit insanity from our children.
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Old 05-05-2018, 09:38 PM   #31
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While we never had kids, my wife and I have a load of nieces and nephews. I have always been a pretty good mechanical troubleshooter and take that ability to all things in life. When something does not work correctly stand back and take a hard look. keep watching, ask questions and work out a solution. this works with machinery, social interactions, political interactions, etc.
When my siblings have issues, it is often my phone that rings.
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Old 05-06-2018, 12:23 AM   #32
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Never let an opportunity for Adventure pass you by. My two daughters went in different directions to do this. One holds, along with 4 friends, the US women's high altitude without oxygen skydiving record, 20,250 feet. The other is an accomplished Shark diver. Happily they both credit my sense of adventure to motivate them to seek the same.
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Old 05-06-2018, 02:37 AM   #33
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I was raised with benign neglect. Didn't turn out badly.

Received three meals a day and assigned chores with a small allowance. Every year, got two new pants, three shirts, and a pair of shoes, Father inducted me to be first mate during his sailboat-racing days. Permitted to wander the neighborhood for adventures with neighborhood kids, and later to take the car to the mountains to backpack with friends and alone. Parents paid for college, which I did for my kids.
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Old 05-06-2018, 10:02 AM   #34
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One that's resonated well with my currently-9-year-old is be skeptical of advertising. If they have to spend money to get your attention then the product is probably crap.

I let him get one or two things from the bargain shelf, ones that had been previously heavily advertised. They were, of course, entirely underwhelming compared to the advertisements. Now I can just ask "did you see an ad for this on TV?" and that pretty much immediately makes him lose interest in it.

Be skeptical. Be kind. Defend yourself and others. Life's always going to be a challenge, rise up to it. Things don't just get done by magic, everything takes effort. Nothing's ever going to be handed to you without effort on your part.

Some folks are just not right in the head, accept this and deal with them wisely. Those faced with challenges didn't chose to have them put on them, help them and do not fall prey to the shitty ways other people treat them. But some folks are never going to be worth the effort, know this and move on.
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Old 05-10-2018, 04:55 PM   #35
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I'm most proud of my (early 20's) kids for their work ethic.

In sports, neither one was particularly talented, but no one outworked them. And the coaches loved them.

Same in academics. They're like bulldogs with the stuff they're interested in.

I've tried to impress on them that I've never known, or employed, a hard-working, honest person who was not at least moderately successful.
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Old 05-10-2018, 06:13 PM   #36
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What skill did you pass on to your kids?

I’ve taught my kids that skin color, nationality, religion, wealth, etc. doesn’t matter when dealing people. People are people. Treat them accordingly. Learn something about them, and from them. Keep the mind open.
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Old 05-14-2018, 01:09 PM   #37
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The same thing my father passed on to me. A good work ethic. All my kids have a great work ethic. The rest is up to them.
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Old 05-17-2018, 06:08 AM   #38
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The main, or most important to me, thing I tried to pass on to my boys is to be a better father than I was. Not that I was a bad one but I could have been better in many ways. Tried to teach them to take their experience as a child and improve on my parenting with their own children. So far they are all wonderful dads and better than I was and I see that every day with our grand kids. I will say that, while admitting my own faults at parenting, I made sure that they understand that none of them came with an Instruction Manual. They never understood that until they had a child. Now they do.

Functional skills revolved around technology, computers. One son is a CTO with a NYC firm. Another is a software training development manager. The 3rd son chases, and catches, women. I had nothing to do with that skill. He developed it on his own.
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