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Old 06-22-2014, 11:16 AM   #41
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Their loss. I think that you will probably be relating your story to other young people. Certainly if asked. The club does not need that, but sounds like it is deserved.

A good club with a pool, sailing classes, and other activities for kids can be a good family investment. If it is focused on the older members only run away. We have been a member (not now), but for the benefits of the Florida Council----not the social aspects. We have done some cruises, but prefer doing our own thing.
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Old 06-22-2014, 11:26 AM   #42
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I dropped all of my memberships, formal volunteering and community involvement a few years ago. Yes one of them was on the executive of the "yacht club."

Great decision for me. Lots less stress. I have enough structure and obligations in my life. I don't need more in my recreation or leisure time.

I'll still volunteer, but on a case by case basis, and for a finite amount of time or to achieve an objective.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:04 PM   #43
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We choose to take the boat and all of our stuff immediately after the incident. We cleaned out our dock box and moved the boat to a marina for a week to let our emotions settle. At the end of the week, we talked to the bridge and decided that we needed to move permanently.

As for the physical part of the altercation, it was mild. It was him poking his finger into her shoulder. But it was still putting his hands on her which is unacceptable at any level.
Wifey B: Now it's finger instead of hands. And it's shoulder. Sorry, but there's a difference. Still wrong. But enough to clean out and leave? No. Enough to talk about when he sobered up if he wasn't sober then, yes. And someone brought up, what did happen to precipitate him doing that? Still doesn't justify his action but if I'm the one handling your complaint I do need to know. I mean man I think the dude was like totally out of line but I don't think you guys handled it the best in the world either. Now sometimes we don't when an action shocks us.

I mean I see myself saying, "Do you want to lose that finger or perhaps another appendage instead?" Maybe something like "If you can't control your finger maybe my hubby and I should amputate it for you." But I would most definitely not have left. When I'm going to leave somewhere it's going to be on my terms, not some buffoon's. And I wouldn't have gone to the board. I believe between my hubby and me we could have impressed upon him that touching me would never be tolerated and he got off lucky that time.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:05 PM   #44
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I dropped all of my memberships, formal volunteering and community involvement a few years ago. Yes one of them was on the executive of the "yacht club."
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Wifey B: That's just like a job. A bad job. An unpaid bad job.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:08 PM   #45
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/rep...-fights,36321/
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:17 PM   #46
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I would have asked him how he would like that finger broken off and shoved where there is no sun light. Then reported his actions to the board. I disagree that the situation was badly handled. Poking someone with a finger is provocative.The guy opened himself up to some serious reaction. I sometimes forget my age, and that puts me in danger of getting my ass kicked. I may lose, but I'll hurt 'em.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:30 PM   #47
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"WASHINGTON—Contradicting the long-held belief that they would just go off and destroy anyone who tried to mess with them, a Department of Health and Human Services report published Thursday revealed that U.S. males would be on average 4,000 percent less effective in a fight than they imagine. “Despite the typical American male’s conviction that he would viciously beat down anyone who came at him and end the whole thing with one punch, we found that in the event of an actual violent altercation, most adult men would almost certainly injure themselves far worse than any assailant,” read the 80-page report, which went on to confirm that nearly all American males would be unable to execute a single maneuver they envision themselves capable of performing, be it an uppercut, a roundhouse, or grabbing an opponent by the back of the neck and smashing his face down into the bar. “Predictions of being amped up on massive adrenaline rushes or having multiple friends jump in to back them up are similarly unfounded, with over 75 percent of confrontations instead projected to end with panicked apologies or pleas to be let out of a headlock.” The report stated, however, that the majority of men correctly estimate that such fights would last a total of six seconds." [Source of quote: The Onion]
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:39 PM   #48
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Yep, I would probably get my ass kicked, but not without a fight. So, who are these supermen that are kicking our asses? Maybe the "Onion" has the answer.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:41 PM   #49
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If I ever run into any of those Onion guys, they're the first ones to get their heads smashed into the bar.

All kidding aside, touching someone--especially a woman, and especially during a heated exchange--is crossing a major line for most people. Eric handled it a lot better than I would have.
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Old 06-22-2014, 12:54 PM   #50
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Oops! Forgot to add the smiley face to my post! Just a little bit of humor, guys, with no disparagement intended at all. :-)
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Old 06-22-2014, 01:09 PM   #51
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It appears a large amount of testosterone has escaped containment and found its way to the trawler forum. A bunch of old guys sitting at their computers imagining how much fun it would be to beat the crap out of an old man.

Two things:
1) If you beat a person for poking your wife, it's likely that you will be the one riding in the back of a police car. If he punched her or knocked her down you might be justified but not for a poke.

2) There is not enough evidence presented here to convict or acquit anyone. We have one side of the story and as we should all know, there are three sides to every story, this guy's, the other guy's and the truth.

The facts that the officers of the club would not take action and the OP decided to leave and not come back tells me that he and/or his wife were not entirely blameless.
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Old 06-22-2014, 01:29 PM   #52
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Ron, you're making a lot of assumptions. How you can say they are partly to blame because they decided to leave is frankly ridiculous. I know Eric personally, have been to the YC in question and trust his description of the event.
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Old 06-22-2014, 02:35 PM   #53
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[
If someone laid their hanfds on my wife they would be picking themselves out of the water or off the floor, and I'd probably have broken my hand.
Bill
When I was Commodore of our club I banned a member for touching a female member of the staff. I was only able to get nine members of the bridge to support my action, the other four members were not present at the meeting.

Don't know what I would have done if the jerk had grabbed one of the wives.
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Old 06-22-2014, 02:41 PM   #54
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The hoity toity yacht club just up the road from us has a swimming pool, tennis courts and a thriving junior program. They have a younger membership than our club but the same percentage of slip huggers. This club has an outpost on Catalina Island that is so little used by their members that it might be given back to the Conservancy that runs the island.
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Old 06-22-2014, 02:46 PM   #55
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If the economy ever returns and average middle class folks can actually afford to boat in my local waters I might help start a local chapter of the Redneck Yacht Club. Sounds like the kind of place where I'd fit right in.

A place without pretense.
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Old 06-22-2014, 03:45 PM   #56
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First, I didn't beat down anyone. A situation where we were berated in front of our 4 year old and someone physically touched my wife, not to "beat her" Rather, IMHO it was to intimidate. It worked. We left.

The words were much more hurtful than anything physical. His opinion was obviously shared by others, as evident by the inaction of the bridge.

Well it worked. We left.

I am a very non confrontational person. The club, boating its all suposed to be fun. Confrontatin, for me isn't.
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Old 06-22-2014, 04:08 PM   #57
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If the economy ever returns and average middle class folks can actually afford to boat in my local waters I might help start a local chapter of the Redneck Yacht Club. Sounds like the kind of place where I'd fit right in.

A place without pretense.

That is a mighty big IF.
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Old 06-22-2014, 05:20 PM   #58
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If the economy ever returns and average middle class folks can actually afford to boat in my local waters I might help start a local chapter of the Redneck Yacht Club. Sounds like the kind of place where I'd fit right in.

A place without pretense.
Need a YC mascot? Poster child?

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Old 06-22-2014, 05:34 PM   #59
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It appears a large amount of testosterone has escaped containment and found its way to the trawler forum. A bunch of old guys sitting at their computers imagining how much fun it would be to beat the crap out of an old man.

Two things:
1) If you beat a person for poking your wife, it's likely that you will be the one riding in the back of a police car. If he punched her or knocked her down you might be justified but not for a poke.

2) There is not enough evidence presented here to convict or acquit anyone. We have one side of the story and as we should all know, there are three sides to every story, this guy's, the other guy's and the truth.

The facts that the officers of the club would not take action and the OP decided to leave and not come back tells me that he and/or his wife were not entirely blameless.
Ron, as a former F-LEO I can tell you if someone grabbed my Wife to intimidate her the tables would turn quickly. I won't or wouldn't put up with it at all. I said the guy would have to pick himself back up or get out of the water, one doesn't need to punch someone to knock them down. I did make a comment that I might break my hand that would be determined by the OM's actions. Sorry I never initiate a fight but I'm not walking away from anyone who would try and berate or intimidate my wife. It has -0- to do with Testosterone and everything to do with protecting or standing up for your wife. As I said women are hands off when it comes to guys of any age.
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Old 06-22-2014, 05:38 PM   #60
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The words were much more hurtful than anything physical. His opinion was obviously shared by others, as evident by the inaction of the bridge.
Well it worked. We left.
.
Wifey B: Well, you present the story but it keeps changing in important ways. It may seem the same to you but to me it's significant. First it was hands on her. Then it was finger poke of shoulder. Now you're saying the words were the real problem. Well, we can't comment on those because we have no idea what either your wife or he said.

I mean I don't talk to a bunch of older strangers the same I do to my younger friends. I don't want to freak them out too bad. Although sometimes that's fun. But seriously, did you then gather yourself and leave more over the words than the poke? Sounds like you wanted to make a statement by leaving and then the board to rally to your cause and beg you to stay. And they didn't.
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