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Old 06-29-2011, 06:48 AM   #1
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How to catch house flies

*What i am about to tell you *will be the demise of many VERY DIRTY house flies.

**Eliminating flies on a boat all you need is a fly swat ,using sprays works, but that stuff is some what toxic in a closed area, stay with the fly swat.

**House flies put on an amazing air show *they land like air plane and take off like helicopters.

*Knowing this fact *I have devised a Fly Trap for use in the far corner garden down wind.

This procedure is a little gross but it works big time. Sorry flies.

*You wil need to obtain the following

*6" dish container *" The Airport"

Some *poop*

*:- * From the pooper or what ever has an pungent aroma.

3 ft 6" of common house screen. 22/7

three *ground supports for the screen base

Can of fly spray.

*Instructions.

Form the house screen wire into a cone say 30" tall with a 12'" opening *at the base, this is the fly trap portion, which you will support on three supports say 4" off the ground pointed end up or you could form a standard 12" tube but you will need to seal the top end off.*

*Place the dish containing the poop *under the base of the screen cone/ tube.

In short order the Poop will attract many flies who will land like a plane at the Airport.

**Because Flies**when the are ready to depart.*take off like Helicopters they cannot help but fly up into the cone screen.*

*Fly panic.

*When several flies are caught trying to escape*vertically*the all go nuts *because they cant get out and fly higher and higher.

Now you can spray them, not bath them.

Soon there will be no more flies in your neighborhood.

*This contraption works like a venus fly trap, the key is having the screen base about 4" above the poop dish *if *set to high the fly will escape.

*I have not figured out how to catch mosquitoes,**you could spray you hedge row where they hang out during the hot summer day. *

*I have no commercial interest in marketing *fly traps to waste management depots.

*

*

*

*


-- Edited by SOMERS on Wednesday 29th of June 2011 06:53:01 AM
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Old 06-29-2011, 08:53 AM   #2
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Re: How to catch house flies

My Daddy's Mouse Trap

Put 3" of water in a bucket.

Place a stack of phone books at the side to form a set of mouse stairs.

Balance a paint stir stick on the edge of the bucket so that a mouse may climb the stairs and walk out the paint stick to get cheese you have cleverly placed there.

Guess what happens when the mouse walks the plank out over the water?
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Old 06-29-2011, 09:21 AM   #3
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How to catch house flies

Elephant trap.

Dig a big pit.

build a fire and fill the*pit with ashes.

place peas all around the pit.

When the elephant comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole.

SD


-- Edited by skipperdude on Wednesday 29th of June 2011 09:22:54 AM
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Old 06-29-2011, 09:46 AM   #4
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Re: How to catch house flies

We hang stick fly tape in the windows where the seem to fly into.* If we have very many flies, when we leave the boat for a couple of hours we spray.* Being on the commercial dock we use to get a lot of flies, but since the commercial and pleasure are no separated the flies tend to be on the commercial boats.* Might want to figure out why the flies are on the boat in the first place?* Something is attracting them.* Maybe its the poop?**
*
As for mice we have tin plates on the lines in the winter, sticky mouse traps trays around the line.* Before they took down the commercial net sheds/buildings around us we had rats on the commercial dock.* The port has rat traps along the docks.*

*
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Old 06-29-2011, 10:34 AM   #5
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Re: How to catch house flies & boobies

*I have a non lethal audio booby trap located on my boat specifically designed to catch a booby in the act of stealing my stuff.*
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Old 06-29-2011, 11:07 AM   #6
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Re: How to catch house flies

Hey Doc,

We do that but we use peanut butter instead of water. Then we put the little mouse out in the woods away from the house.
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Old 06-29-2011, 11:25 AM   #7
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Re: How to catch house flies

While living in a mountain top community, we had several small animal pests.* I used peanut butter and apples to bait a small animal trap.* On the outskirts of town were two churches situated on large, wooded pieces of land.* One is Catholic and one is Presbyterian.* Of course the Chip "monks" being Catholic were let loose near the Catholic church.* Ray Stevens had a song about a squirrel getting loose in a Baptist church.* So, I fugured the squirrels and raccoons were Protestants.* They were let loose*near the Presbytarian church.* Problem solved.* All parties were happy.*
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Old 06-29-2011, 12:09 PM   #8
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How to catch house flies

Ha!!! Don Man. I'm Laughing My ass off.


-- Edited by skipperdude on Wednesday 29th of June 2011 12:09:44 PM
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Old 06-29-2011, 08:32 PM   #9
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Re: How to catch house flies

Quote:
skipperdude wrote:
Ha!!! Don Man. I'm Laughing My ass off.



-- Edited by skipperdude on Wednesday 29th of June 2011 12:09:44 PM
*Hey, SD.* You can laugh, but they really are Protestants.Try this.

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Old 06-29-2011, 09:27 PM   #10
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Re: How to catch house flies

I kinda liked SDs elephant trap myself...now that did have me laughing my ash hole off - well nearly, but hey, I need it for later..
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Old 06-30-2011, 06:39 AM   #11
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Re: How to catch house flies

Quote:
Moonstruck wrote:skipperdude wrote:
Ha!!! Don Man. I'm Laughing My ass off.



-- Edited by skipperdude on Wednesday 29th of June 2011 12:09:44 PM
*Hey, SD.* You can laugh, but they really are Protestants.Try this.



*Ray Stevens has a way with words and song.
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Old 06-30-2011, 06:43 PM   #12
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Re: How to catch house flies

*Ha !.

I have got one of those *donkey things he live next to us.

*except it walks around in two's and is as thick as a short plank.

*Of course you know what is more dangerous than mosquitoes and flies *it is a blue bird with a machine gun. more... Ha!

Who is the smartest of them all*? It's *a me so why do you ask ? Tonto.
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Old 07-01-2011, 06:57 AM   #13
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How to catch house flies

*I thought that we we were having a debate about mosquitoes *and house / boat flies.

We could get on to dealing with seafaring ants and seafaring rattlers *especially those that get into the kitchen / galley / your bunk.

*Then there are rats that get on boats *a very real problem " *Bigus Ratus Naughtiness" rat droppings .

*If it moves salute it ,if not paint it.

*


-- Edited by SOMERS on Friday 1st of July 2011 06:59:03 AM
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Old 07-01-2011, 07:25 AM   #14
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Re: How to catch house flies

Quote:
SOMERS wrote:
*I thought that we we were having a debate about mosquitoes *and house / boat flies.

We could get on to dealing with seafaring ants and seafaring rattlers *especially those that get into the kitchen / galley / your bunk.

*Then there are rats that get on boats *a very real problem " *Bigus Ratus Naughtiness" rat droppings .

*If it moves salute it ,if not paint it.

*


*Oh, the British!* I love the*British humor
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Old 07-01-2011, 08:33 AM   #15
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Re: How to catch house flies

Got rats on your boat? Get a snake, preferably non poisonous!
Steve W.
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Old 07-01-2011, 08:50 AM   #16
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How to catch house flies

A little trivia question. What is the only major port without rats?

Anchorage Alaska.*

WE can't even have a pet rat.

Why anyone would want one I have no idea

SD

By the way Don I clicked on that video feed. *Now I have that stupid song about the squirrel stuck in my head.



*



*



-- Edited by skipperdude on Friday 1st of July 2011 09:20:04 AM


-- Edited by skipperdude on Friday 1st of July 2011 09:21:36 AM
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Old 07-01-2011, 10:55 AM   #17
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How to catch house flies

*Brits by golly.

We are not really British in the truest sence of the word, but we *have been *labeled by the Brits or Limeys , BOTC's *names given by their own *political calling .

And to be politically correct we are defined by the *arrogant *Brit Limeys as :-

British Overseas Territorial Citizens *or *BOTC's *an un- appetizing label for sure.

*There, unfortunately is no country on the planet that carries the name BOTC.

*So we have to be satisfied *living in the Colonies as National Geographic would define us as having *nice coral sandy beaches, having 101+ islands, *10,001 palm trees swaying in the cool S.W. *breeze, and one Hum V. *Oh ! .......

I almost forgot no income tax. of course we have no Royal Navy unless you include 6 high speed 70 ft cat *hull ferry bullet boats .

No Wall marts *or Geico yet, we are working on it, Radio shack went under , have CNN, & HSBC *" The worlds local bank" and a few Island Mosquitoes.

*I have often thought that Bermuda an island Paradise for sure with a zillion coral reefs with fish.

(discovered juan Bermudas prior 1609 )

*However could be more aptly named *Anglo- American sea side place.

Coconuts and Bananas for lunch on whole wheat *or *British Cucumber sandwiches, how terribly delightful Mr & Mrs Ramsbottom. *She is a fish wife.

*Most of us speek three languages .*Bermudian, Bermudian , Bermudian & Benjamins.

*My father told me that:-

*" You are what you want to be."

and*

"What you are , is what you are going to be"

**Andromeda*let it rest*.


-- Edited by SOMERS on Friday 1st of July 2011 12:54:12 PM
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Old 07-01-2011, 01:57 PM   #18
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Re: How to catch house flies

Hey Dude,

Mice are kinda cute but rats have ugly tails. The WORST thing you can have in/on your boat is otters** .....river otters. A whole garbage can full of rats can't make the mess the otters can. They are at the Ketchikan Yacht Clubs float. Maybe they got rid of them though. There's Ketchikan Creek, all the fish and the boats to play in too***** .....if they can get in that is. Hey Diver do you have them up where you are? None here in Thorne Bay. We'll prolly come over on the 4th or 5th otters or no.
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Old 07-13-2011, 03:28 AM   #19
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Re: How to catch house flies

So there I was(all good storys start that way) Had a mouse problem,soo got one of those sticky pad thingys cause the admiral did want to hurt itwith a trap. Yea go figure. So,a day goes by and we hear this awful squeaking and we caught the mouse, however our Pure bread Belizian Coconut Retriever(dog) saw it too, he grabs the mouse which is stuck to the sticky thing and the sticky thing sticks to his head. Now I have a live mouse stuck to the top of my dogs head, the dog loseing his mind,the Admiral loseing her mind, The nieghbors haveing the best time . Finally got a hold of the dog,peeled the sticky thing with the mouse off his head and dissposed of it. Poor dog had an empty patch of hair on his head for a long time. Moral--Use Traps.BB
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Old 07-13-2011, 04:28 AM   #20
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Re: How to catch house flies

Now that could have made America's Funniest Videos! :teevee:
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