We use the shifters, throttles, and rudders in docking. We also have a permanent spring line on our dock hung on a high PVC pole where my wife can reach it from the forward quarter as we enter the slip. She puts it through the midship hawse and on the midship cleat and I ease the boat foward to take up the slack. Using this line, the dockside engine (starboard in our case) in forward and the rudders hard over away from the dock (port) I can pin the boat against the dock in even a strong direct crosswind. With the boat pinned to the dock there is no frantic rush to get the rest of the lines secured--- the boat's not going anywhere.
One thing that can get people in trouble when maneuvering is the belief that they are moving the bow around when they manipulate the transmissions, use the rudder, etc. If you have a bow thruster obviously that DOES move the bow, but everything else moves the stern. The bow does move somewhat because of the pivoting action of the boat but I've learned that maneuvering becomes a whole lot easier when you envision everything from the point of view of moving the stern.
I hate the sight picture from the flying bridge and so always dock the boat from the lower helm station. I find it's much easier (for me) to accurately judge the boat's position relative to the dock, neighboring boat, etc. from down below than from up above. Plus it's an easy matter to step out and assist my wife with lines if necessary. But other people prefer docking from the flying bridge, so there's no right or wrong in this regard.
And we practice what John preached in his post with regards to "going around" if the docking looks like it's not working out. Personally, I think this is the source of most docking problems. People get so determined, or desperate, to get to the dock that they'll do anything to get there and get the tension and worry and fear over with. Even to the point where crunching something is better than prolonging the uncertainty and fear that they MIGHT crunch something.
In reality, a boat underway is better off away from the dock, just as an airplane in flight is better off away from the ground. So we have no compunction about backing out or away if things aren't looking right and going back out to the turning basin to make another approach. I've done this as many as four times on occasion. It's the crunch of a collision that turns everyones' heads, not the sight of a boat going back and forth between a slip and the turning basin. As long as the boat hasn't hit anything, you don't have to pay to fix anything.
Our slip is oriented so we usually have an aft quartering crosswind blowing us off our dock and, depending on the state of the tide, a direct crosscurrent in one direction or the other. So it's important to figure out which way everything is moving well before arriving at the slip so that the best manner of compensating for these things can be worked out. For example, we never align ourselves with the slip before entering it. Doing so would cause us to be blown or carried out of alignment in short order. So I treat every docking, either in our home slip or anywhere else, in the same way as I dock a floatplane (which has no brakes, no reverse, and at slow speeds very little rudder authority). I bring the boat up to the dock at an angle, even our home slip which we share with another boat, get the bow right up to the dock and then walk the stern in with the props and rudders.
Another problem I've observed a lot, and that I am guilty of more often than not, is people often approach docks or slips going way too slow. A rudder doesn't work unless there is water flowing over it. As soon as you get too slow two things happen, both of them bad. First, you lose rudder authority and so have little control over moving the stern around. Second, the wind or current or both can now get a good grip on your boat and shove it around at will.
I believe the key to keeping control is keeping some speed up when coming into a dock or slip. This is a major judgement call and takes a lot of practice to know what is too much speed and what is not enough. Obviously you don't want to come roaring in. But being too timid with the power, or momentum, prior to arriving at the dock can lead to a loss of control as the wind and current take over.
But as far as a home slip goes, the best possible docking aid in our opinion is that fixed spring line hung on a PVC pole where it can be reached as the boat enters the slip. Get that line aboard and on the midship cleat, go forward to take the slack out, and pin the boat to the dock with power and rudder. My wife used to worry herself sick at the end of a cruise if we had to dock in strong or adverse winds because she'd have to jump to our somewhat tippy dock with a line and secure it in a big hurry. Now with our permanent line the pressure is off and she is confident about our docking even if the wind is blowing pretty hard.
And on the couple of super-windy days when my boat handling caused her to drop it I simply backed out and we went to a vacant downwind slip and tied up so we could walk around and rehang our line.
